Intuitive Teachers Crack The Box Of Labels

A: She had the delicacy of a Japanese doll. Her eyes were sparkling and her fair complexion was in strong contrast to her jet black hair. She smiled with warmth but her laughter kept in. She spoke in whispers and hardly ever raised her hand.

B: His writing was magnetic and the intensity of the events he logged down through his Creative Writing classes was in strong contrast to his absent looks. He had nothing much to share with the teachers and stood quietly when asked to answer a question or add his views.

C: His competitiveness was the talk of the school. Whether it was Sports or his academics, he was always at the top. Yet, there were few friends in his life. Most of the boys who walked with him were loud and threatening in their ways. He glared at students who didn’t match his intellect and often fell into fights or trouble.

D: He often stood outside the Head Mistress’s office pulled out from class for his low grades. He was in his O’ Levels and nothing seemed to be motivating him enough to improve his scores. He had a charming smile and always greeted the passing teacher.

Let me share their stories:

A: She was extremely well mannered and courteous in her conduct. When I met her parents the first time they spoke with the same politeness and were less speakers. They sat upright and consumed all the magic words. They informed me about their daughter being quite meek in nature and her writing speed was worse than a tortoise.

I watched her closely through my classes. Every time I entered the classroom she would stand in respect and greet me with a big smile. I never heard her voice but her eyes carried a strange twinkle that made me wonder what was going through her mind. It got me thinking. I created a small activity for the students as part of our Nouns and Adjectives class.

“Okay children, imagine you are in the jungle. Think of any animal that you would like to be and act it out. The rest of you have to identify the animal and describe it.” They all got into groups deciding upon the names. I watched her huddle in with her group mates giggling softly. Suddenly there was argument. She left the group and sat down with a sad face. “What happened?” I asked her friends. “Teacher we are asking her to become a deer but she is insisting she wants to be a bear!”

It clicked me there and then. She was fed up of the set expectations that we all held for her completely oblivious of her own desires to move on. She was a meek child but was now ready to hop on to level 2. I made room for her to practice her bear skills and the roars reached her home to awaken her parents to her real needs and rise in expectations. Children change with time and this change is visible only when the teacher does not believe in labels.

B: I was amazed by his essays. He would create magic with his words and small comic strips. There were detailed descriptions and every minor detail mattered. I would always read out his creative work to the class but as I would do so, he would detach his attention to the acknowledgement being given. When asked a question in class he would stand in panic despite his impressive ability to comprehend matters. He would curl his fingers to a fist and became visibly nervous.

I noticed this on many occasions. At first I thought maybe he has not been encouraged much before and doesn’t know how to handle the attention well. Though it was just the beginning of the term, I started to search the internet primarily to find ways of boosting his self-esteem. Strangely, I came across an article in a magazine that spoke of a scientific term ‘Selective Mutism’. As I read the article, it convinced me more and more of this child’s situation. He was an intelligent boy. He was comfortable with people of his choice. He had all the expression in stored but he shrunk his voice and presence in a crowd as a selective option.

I realised that all the while that I had been focusing on him was just what I was not supposed to do with him. I felt I needed help and with the permission of my Supervisor, I addressed the issue with the parents. They listened carefully and followed up with a child Psychologist. Eventually I understood the need to engage his abilities using indirect methods and means.

The Year end concert had all teachers complaining about his sudden urge to talk much at rehearsals and though he still chose to silence his voice often, there was a big smile that conveyed a mutual respect for each other’s individuality.

Some children need acceptance on being their own-self. This is possible only when the teacher understands the gravity of the situation and does not believe in labels.

C: There was loud applause in the playground as he won the medals one after the other. The teacher handling the Yellow House boys came to me in a while as he followed behind. “Ms. Shama, he gets into verbal abuse every two minutes with the boys who aren’t running as fast for the house. This is killing their enthusiasm. He does this in class too. I think he should be disqualified!”

The complaints from his teachers had become a routine and so I called up the father to speak to him. He was in his office. He heard me with patience and assured me that he would address the issue as soon as he would get home from school.

Just as I placed the phone down, my Supervisor asked me about the problem. As I related the issues to her, she looked me in the eye and asked, “You know his father gets quite physical with him?” I felt a shudder. “No, I didn’t know that!” She read my anxiety and made me sit down. “This boy has been with us since Kindergarten. His mother works too. The parents don’t have much communication. They have odd timings. The father basically attends to all his needs and is harsh most of the time.”

I left the office with the dreadful news cursing myself for placing the child in such a horrible afternoon. I walked past his classroom. He sat there lost and quite visibly anticipating the beating at home. I had to do something. I decided to call back.

“Hello Mr.X. I’m calling you back just to inform you that your son’s quite upset with my phone call to you. Probably he’s expecting a harsh scolding from you.” He listened quietly and then said, “Well, he should know when he’ll do something wrong, he will get punished.” The rules of the book were pretty much decided. “I’m just a little curious though. He is doing so well in school related to his academics and extra-curricular, then why is his behaviour such a matter of concern. I’m sure you must be very proud of him for getting such good grades and medals of honour!”

“You see teacher, his mother leaves home when he is sleeping and gets back after I have put him to bed. I have to teach him everything and do my work too. He tries to be clever with me and I don’t have the patience sometimes. I understand what you are saying but it’s difficult to make boys do things especially when they think they know more.”

I could sense his frustration and anger to have been cornered into the situation. I thought he needed acknowledgement for his committed part. “It’s kind of fascinating to see a concerned father like you. Mostly I see the women struggling in this area. I don’t know how you do it, but you’re quite right, it is exhausting and children challenge you all the time!” He finally gave a chuckle and lightened up a little. “I think he must miss his mother and maybe he is less expressive or rather lacks the softness in expression due to her absence.” He was moving in the right direction.

 “Well, since this is the arrangement for now Mr.X, then I suggest we calm down a little about it. I’m glad you know what’s missing in his life. It could just be possible that you start looking at this time that you spent with him as a chance to transfer your positive traits onto him. Bond with him in a way that both of you remember this time as great memories. He is a good boy! He needs your approval every now or than and I’m sure you can be a great team!

Some children hide their scars. The only way a teacher can tend to their wounds is to discard labels and believe in her own healing powers which are possible with the will to bring about a change.

D: I often saw him laughing with a merry heart during recess time with his friends. He was a different person in class. He was a usual visitor to the Head Mistress’s office and teachers had lost their faith in his abilities to clear his O’ Level exams. The laughter would disappear for days.

One day during the school assembly, his name was called out to receive a trophy. I clapped louder than ever on finding out that he had lead the school football team to victory. He gathered his team mates and decided to receive it together. His face lit up with the immense applause and he patted all team mates for their roles. I was impressed with the maturity that he conducted himself.

I was the Grade 3 teacher and we were planning our termly newsletter at that time. I always engaged my students in the content and designing of the letter. But this time, I decided to add something important that would teach not just my students a skill but also allow other teachers to begin to talk about student strengths and aptitudes more.

“I would like “Y” to dress up for an interview and come to my Grade 3. The children want to interview the School Football Captain about Football as a sport and about Sportsmanship.” The Senior Supervisor got the message to the boy who walked up to me later on and asked, “Teacher, should I wear a suit for the interview?” I fell in love with his innocence. “Of course! It’s quite formal! And do prepare a little introduction to get the questions started.”

The whole event was filled with pride. He spoke exceptionally well about the sport itself. He attached his personal dreams of making it to an international team. And like any good mentor, advised the students to understand the importance of teamwork and peer support.

Some children need platforms to support their dreams. This is possible only if the teacher is able to drop the label and adjust her focus towards a win.

All of these children were part of my teaching years and the reason why I decided to write about them was to put forward the argument that: An Intuitive Teacher can identify the hidden fears and underlying deficiencies of any child provided she/he has the vision to acknowledge the many possibilities trapped in a box of labels.